The Only New Years Resolution You Need

It’s about this time each year that I begin considering my New Years resolution. Call it an intention, a word of the year, or just a little extra focus. Regardless, December is a time when many of us reflect on the past year, and consider how to proceed forward into the new year.

2020 has been a year unlike any other. The unpredictability has made it difficult to plan or calculate much beyond a day or two. We’ve had to be prepared for any or all of our plans to be derailed. In other words, it’s been a year of plannis interruptus.

So why then do we still feel an urge to set a New Years resolution when we come to December? What is it about setting goals that gets us feeling motivated and positive about the impeding year?

I believe it’s in our nature to plan and anticipate events in our future. To hope for the best possible scenarios, and to desire some control over our trajectory. But it’s this same desire that can potentially make us feel overwhelmed, deflated, and disappointed when our lives unfold differently.

I used to believe that sticking to a New Years resolution (or any goal for that matter) despite all odds, was something to be proud of. In some instances, that may be true. But perhaps our culture has applied that philosophy to too many areas of our lives.

Maybe we need to be more selective in what we’re willing to push through, and what we’re willing to let go. While I still love the feeling that comes with accomplishing a goal, I want to enjoy the ride too.

Achieving a goal, as invigorating as it can feel, is only that. A feeling. It’s not a consistent place we can dwell. In truth, it’s a checkpoint along our path. It’s not the destination.

Instead of a New Years resolution, an intention, or even a word, I’m considering what direction I wish to go, come 2021. Perhaps it’s all semantics, but I’ve always considered semantics to matter.

For me, 2021 will be about choosing a path that allows me to enjoy the ride, as well as the checkpoints.

I’ll do my best to give grace to myself and others, and allow for hiccups and rest stops. I’ll lean into trust, believing that every step I take is a step in the “right” direction. And with any luck, the ride will be even more enjoyable than the destination.

2020 may have brought us buckets full of strife, anxiety, fear, sadness, worry, anger, loss, and more. But it has also brought us an invitation to pause long enough to reflect deeply. Long enough to feel the discomfort that comes from being on the go for too long. Perhaps it’s worth choosing to maintain some of this reflection going forward.

Be gentle with yourself as we come to the close of a very difficult year. Trust that you’ve done the best you could with what you had, and that is was enough. Give yourself some grace, and try to remember that putting one foot in front of the other will get you to where you’re headed.

Be well,
Anon